Trust in the Lord

I know this is basically what I wrote about last week and that I have been writing a lot about trusting in God the past few whatevers. But, this came to mind to write as the blog post today and I feel like sharing it.

Alrighty. In July we had a Zone Conference and the main topic was "align your will"

What does it mean to trust?

Well, here are some necessary elements for trust....

• Risk/possibility of harm
• Expectation of safety
• Give up control

Risk- Often we are asked to do something and questions like these come to mind...What if I look like a fool? What will happen if I do that? No one will like me... I won't like the change. I don't know what to say! How are they going to react? 

Many times with risk, we have a fear of the unknown. We have feelings of uncertainty. We have to take a risk. Our missionaries said that risk is anything you put on the alter of sacrifice. You are going to sacrifice your comfort, the known, to trust in the Lord.

Expectation of Safety- There are angels about you, the spirit will guide, God won't let you down.

There are promises all over the scriptures to those who trust in the Lord and do His will. Sometimes we are afraid to keep a commandment (remember risk?) but we just have to trust that the promises will be fulfilled that the Lord has made with us.

Give up Control- This is when you give Him your all. You submit to His will and fully rely on Him to keep His promises. You hold nothing back. 

I think about the trust fall...If you haven't heard of a trust fall, go look them up. Basically one person falls backwards into the arms of someone standing behind them.

Remember, that even if the promises don't seem to come, trust that they will come in due time and give the Lord your all. 

Some things that were mentioned in the conference to help us learn to trust God more were these: Put more on the alter, believe more, and rely on Him more. 

There is a skit online by Onetimeblind where Christ asks the girl to trust Him in a trust fall. She refuses to trust Him at the end because she can't see anyone behind her. I think this says a lot about when God asks us to do things and we can't see the end result. That's what is hard. That takes faith, that takes trust. And it is always well worth it.

Meekness and Humility

I was flipping through one of my mission journals today and I came across an experience or two that made me think of humility and meekness.

The first one was last March when I was struggling with something. I humbled myself and asked for a priesthood blessing. After the blessing I felt so happy.

I then read the rest of my journal entry for that day, and as I read I reflected on how humble those two Elders were and are. I don't know what it is like to be asked to give a priesthood blessing, but I can imagine that it is a humbling experience. You are asked to be the mouthpiece of God to one of His children. It isn't just a prayer in front of a congregation, but the Lord speaking directly to an individual. Wow. One must really be in tune with the spirit in that situation and must be submissive enough to say the things the Lord wants said instead of what they want to say. It blows me away every time.

Another journal entry in July was reflecting on the talk "Meekly Drenched in Destiny" by Elder Neal A Maxwell. I wrote down this sentence: Being meek doesn't mean you are a doormat. Often we realize that those that are meek and humble are submissive. We don't always realize though that they are submissive to God's will and His gospel, and not always others. Someone who is meek and humble can also be steadfast and immovable. They remember that it is better to save one soul than it is to save one's face.

In Preach My Gospel chapter 6, this is what it says about Humility

"Humility is willingness to submit to the will of the Lord and to give the Lord the honor for what is accomplished. It includes gratitude for His blessings and acknowledgment of your constant need for His divine help. Humility is not a sign of weakness; it is a sign of spiritual strength. When you humbly trust Him and acknowledge His power and mercy, you can have the assurance that His commandments are for your good. You are confident that you can do whatever the Lord requires of you if you rely on Him. You are also willing to trust His chosen servants and follow their counsel. Humility will help you as you strive to be obedient, to work hard, and serve selflessly..." (emphasis added)

 This quote is awesome. Just saying. Read it over and over again. It's great. When I read this quote, I ask myself these questions: Do I submit to the will of the Lord? Do I give Him the honor? Do I know that I need His help? Do I know that whatever He asks me to do is for my good? Do I follow Him willingly, knowing that whatever He has asked me to do, I can accomplish?

I know this is short, and I know I didn't go into great depth on this subject, but I hope that what I have written can spark some thoughts in your minds and hearts. I know that submitting to the will of the Lord, trusting in Him, is amazing and that as we truly humble ourselves before Him, there is nothing that we can't accomplish.

"Lose Yourself and Go to Work"

Many know that this is the phrase that Gordon B. Hinckley's father wrote him while he was serving a mission.

This is a lesson that took me quite a while to learn while I was on my mission, and even near the end, I wasn't perfect at it.

As I pulled out the letters back and forth to Pres. Wirthlin today, I realized how nervous I was about doing everything right. I wanted to make sure I didn't mess up. I wanted to make sure that no one thought ill of me. I was so worried about being perfect, that I got caught up in myself.

As President Benson says in his talk "Beware of Pride" : "Fear of men's judgment manifests itself in competition for men's approval. The proud love 'the praise of men more than the praise of God.' (John 12:42-43.) Our motives for the things we do are where the sin is manifest. Jesus said He did 'always those things' that pleased God. (John 8:29.) Would we not do well to have the pleasing of God as our motive rather than to try to elevate ourselves above our brother and outdo another?"

I was guilty of pride. And that's ok. I look back and think "how many times were we encouraged to read that talk?" So many times! And all of us were! Because all of us deal with pride. It is such a common sin. And all of us are guilty.

As I lost myself in God's work and didn't worry about what others thought, I was able to be so much happier. When all I cared about was what God thought of me, I performed so much better. And perhaps on the outside to others I didn't perform better, but on the inside, I did. My motives were pure. My desires were aligned with God, and even if I messed up, my desires had been in the right place.

As I continued through the letters I wrote President, I noticed that they became less focused on myself and more focused on the people and my testimony of the gospel. My emails were much more light and happy, filled with joy and the spirit. I know that when I aligned my will and my motives with God's, every day became brighter.

This relates to the self-love post I put on beexceedinglyglad last week. When I didn't care anymore about what others thought of me, I loved myself more, and found peace.

I am grateful that God has taught me so much and has helped me to become the person He needs me to be. I am grateful as well that I am not perfect, life would be boring if that was the case. I learn so much every day because of the Lord. I know He lives. I know He loves us perfectly.

Planning and Sacrifice

Most people understand that missionaries are supposed to learn how to plan. They hear about the missionary daily planner, daily planning, weekly planning, lesson planning, etc.

God is a planner. There's something called....The Plan of Salvation. Whoa. And His is a house of order, He's got to be pretty organized right?

Well, fortunately for me, I started my mission off already having been a crazy organized planner person. I still learned more about planning as I tore apart chapter 8 of Preach My Gospel. As I continued my mission though, I found that no matter how much prayer and faith you included in your planning process, things still changed.

Everyone knows that things don't always go as planned. And for me, that was super hard to accept. I like to be in control of everything. I want things to go my way. If something throws a wrench in my plans, well, then they deal with a grumpy person that has a thundercloud over their head. Or at least that's what I sometimes see...

As my mission progressed, I got a little bit better at accepting that things weren't always going to be in my control. Try as I might, others have different opinions than mean. Also, the Master Planner's plans can over-ride mine all the time. So since He knows best, shouldn't I just give up my will and follow what He has in store? Yes.

That's a bit harder, no, a lot harder than it is to say.

I had a companion that once said something like this... "before we go into a lesson, we say a prayer. It's kinda like burning the offering. We've planned, we've prepared, but we pray so that we have the spirit with us and also so that if God wants to teach something else, we will be willing to be His mouthpiece. We will surrender our will to His. He knows His children much better than we do."

Burning the offering. Sacrifice right? What are we putting on God's alter? Our will, our control, our trust. We decide to trust in Him and have faith that He will take care of each situation.

Joshua 1:9
"Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest."
D&C 123:17
"Therefore, dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for His arm to be revealed."

There you go. Remember, He is with you. Therefore, do all you can and then... Don't Worry About It, Buddy! (the DWAIB concept). :)

I love you, I love the gospel. I love my Heavenly Father. I am so grateful that no matter what, He is kind and compassionate. He loves all of us so much. Even though we get frustrated with His plans sometimes, or we take our trust in Him away, He still loves us unconditionally. What a great Father. :)

Patience 1- patience and charity

Wow. Patience is such a great thing! I am so in love with patience!

Even before my mission, people would tell me that I had great patience. I don't think they understood the emotions that boiled within me though. There was much resentment that was held back. Often I would vent to someone else about something or I would cry unnecessarily about something else. Working at Trefoil Ranch helped me to exercise my patience, yet often I would come home on the weekends exhausted and not wanting to go back. Sure, I looked patient on the outside and acted patient, but on the inside...ooo....yeah, don't mess with me.

Then I went on a mission. I was tried and tried again with patience. Whether it was with companions, leaders, or just random people in the ward or on the streets, I would be impatient. I would get frustrated. I realized what was going on and spent some serious time praying and studying the attributes of Christ. Charity and Patience were the two that stuck out to me the most in PMG (Preach My Gospel chapter 6).

I wanted to apply the things I was learning, but it was so difficult. How could I become more patient? Preach My Gospel says "You need patience in your everyday experiences and relationships, especially with you companion. You must be patient with all people, yourself included, as you work to overcome faults and weaknesses." Be patient, be patient, be patient! How was I supposed to gain patience?

Well, I did the study boxes and I prayed fervently. I also had to continue reminding myself that I didn't have to be perfect. My companion didn't have to be perfect. No one had to be perfect. My expectations were unrealistic of others and of myself. I wasn't seeing people through God's eyes, but I was seeing all of us through my contorted and blurred vision. It's like someone had performed surgery on my eyes and told me that I was seeing things so much better now, when in reality, everything looked much more horrid. Luckily, God changed that.

When I knew that my vision was twisted, I started focusing on how the Lord saw people. And of course, God sent people into my life that I needed to have a lot of patience for. And because God allowed me that chance to grow my patience, amazing things happened. I prayed to see them and understand them the way that God does. I asked to see myself that way too. The more I have done this, the more patient I have become with others. I realize that we all make mistakes and that it is ok that we make mistakes. We are expected to make mistakes. That is what life is about. It is about testing and learning and growing. It's really hard to grow and test your abilities is you never take risks. If we never put our feet in front of one another, how are we ever going to know how fast we can run? We will never enjoy the feeling of freedom if we never break the supposed chains around us. Often we have put the chains around ourselves; excuses to cover our fear, lies from the adversary that we have believed, and others. We can break through and we can run. All we have to do is take that first step.

Like I have said before, I am so grateful for those who have patience with me. Those who don't judge because they understand that I am human. They know that I will make mistakes. They understand that God loves me, and they love me too. Thank you for being so kind! It's so amazing to me that God gives us each other to help one another. When we are patient and loving and kind to one another, life is so much easier. Support systems are great! It's so nice to have a friend along for the journey!

Patience and charity truly intertwine, what a glorious concept. When we truly love one another, we have much more patience with one another. When we understand each others circumstances, it's easier to be patient and love one another. I love it. Go hug someone today. :)

Communication 1-love between companions

Communication.

Yes, I learned a lot about communication on my mission. I can't even begin to describe how much I learned and am still learning. It's amazing.

When you are with someone 24/7 there are bound to be quirks and things that may or may not bug you. I learned a lot about how much of the tension can be reduced if we but communicate our feelings to one another.

One of my companions was always very open and honest with me. We got along very well. Why? I think a lot of it had to do with being honest and straightforward with each other. If something was bugging us, we told the other immediately. We would explain why we felt the way we did, the other may explain why they do/did what they did, and an understanding would come. Improvements weren't always made immediately, but because there was an understanding, there was love. There was always love. I never questioned my companion's love for me. We were trying to become better as well as help each other become better. That shows love.

Another thing that helped us out was that compliments were given frequently. Sometimes we worry that if we get compliments a lot that they won't mean as much to us. The compliments themselves will seem less sincere. I found out that this wasn't true for our case. Often the same compliments were given "you are so awesome!" or "You are a great teacher!" and such. These compliments were often just another way that we would say "I love you" to each other.

We also communicated through service to each other. These were often very small acts that only took a minute or two to do. But they were always greatly appreciated and treasured. There were many times I would find little notes on my desk or in my journal or somewhere else random. They were often simple, but they meant the world to me. Other times we sang each other to sleep at night. What a great blessing! How calming a lullaby can be! Especially through the stressful times of being a missionary in the middle of winter. These, and other little things we did for each other, carried the message of love on a much bigger scale.

And last, but definitely not least, we listened to one another. There were many times when one of us would be struggling with something or would have a question on our minds. Many times these issues may have seemed too big or too personal to share with someone. But as we began to trust one another, we began to share more often. When we really listened with a loving and caring heart, our trust grew. Deep conversations were common. Changes that may have took us years and years to accomplish were pointed out and tackled together more quickly. We supported one another in our goals. We reminded each other of our hearts' desires. We received revelation through listening and sharing with one another. What an amazing blessing.

Because we loved each other, we acted like it. Because we acted like it, we loved each other more and more. Our patience with each other increased. Our charity increased. Our compassion and kindness increased. Our skills in one on one conversations increased. Our spirituality increased. Our love increased and it was amazing.

I believe that you can have a similar experience, whether it be with a missionary companion, close friend, or spouse. When both of you are committed to the Lord and becoming a better person, as well as helping the other find and follow their own path to come closer to the Lord, your love for each other will increase and bloom. It's an amazing thing. Note that I said to help them find and follow their own path to come closer, not make them or force them to be on your path. That is vital.

I know that Jesus Christ is my Savior. I know that Heavenly Father is always mindful of us. He has put us in each others' lives for a purpose. We can learn so much from each experience we have, there doesn't have to be such a thing as a bad experience- it's just an experience that stretched our limits and helped us grow in a way we may have not been too fond of. :)

I love you all. Have a wonderful day!

Heroes-reflecting on the past through a dream

As I begin this, I hope and pray that I can convey my thoughts and feelings into words.

This morning I woke up from a dream. Not because it was a nightmare, no, but because the impact it made on me was so great that I woke and had to write it down. After spending an hour trying to get back to sleep, I knew I just had to get up and write it here as well.

In my dream I was assigned to speak in church back in Highland. There were visitors there, not necessarily famous people, but people that hold a special place in my heart. Family, family, and well, family. And if you were wondering, family includes all of you.

The first thing I can remember in detail from this dream was the musical number before I spoke. It was "Bring Him Home" from Les Miz sung by the ward choir. I accompanied on the guitar (an amazing feat since I've been only playing for about 4 days). I believe the piano was also played.

Bring Him Home- Claude-Michel Schoenberg from Les Miz
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U7RESeXNHj0

It was then my turn to speak. I had a little 3x5 card in front of me as well as the music to the musical number. I approached the podium and tried to put my thoughts together about Heroes. As I watched a brother of mine sit down in the audience, I was overwhelmed.  I had prayed for him many times (making the musical number mean that much more to me) and I saw the changes in his life. I decided to share just a part of his story.

He had had a rough life, he had had many challenges. He had many setbacks as he strove daily to overcome his trials. And now I was seeing him in church, he was in a white shirt and tie, he was clean shaven, he had helped with the sacrament, and he was shining. He never gave up and the Lord never gave up on him. He was my hero.

Heroes are persistent. Heroes aren't heroes because they have things come to them easily, they are heroes because they never give up on what they believe and want even when they fail multiple times. In fact, they never fail, they just have temporary setbacks (thanks Sis. R!) Heroes overcome. That's what makes them heroes. They have strength to carry on, they look inside and find hope.

Tears filled my eyes as I spoke and looked at his beaming face in the audience. Here was a man who had endured his trials and faced his fears. Here was a hero. I remember giving him a hug and then I woke up with this song running through my head.

Hero- Mariah Carey
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tLFfXTwdVbY

Thoughts flooded my mind as I laid in bed thinking about what had just happened. I thought about heroes and what makes a hero a hero.Then, I got up and started writing things down.

Heroes follow their heart. And what is in their hearts? Good things. The Lord inspires men to do good. I thought of this scripture and I know that there are more... D&C 8:2 "Yea, behold, I will tell you in your mind and in your heart, by the Holy Ghost, which shall come upon you and which shall dwell in your heart."

So many of my heroes, on my mission and off, have wanted to follow the Lord. They want to live for God. They are strong, determined, dedicated, and willing to sacrifice for what they believe in. They are courageous and achieve great things. Many give everything they have to give. They understand that when the going gets rough that they grow. They have a fire inside of them and have great endurance. They know that the real victories are one on one. They know that the Lord helps them to win. They are humble enough to let the Lord help them overcome and become better.

Who Will Be the Real Hero- Batdorf and Mclean
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IuOoFWVRSg

I want to say thank you to the heroes in my life. You are many. Thank you. I have been greatly influenced my your examples. I love you and hold you in my heart. Thank you for all you do, all you have done, and all that you are. I know that the Lord has placed us in each others' paths for a reason. I know that the Lord knows us personally and will use each of us to help His other children. I know that heroes are real. People don't have to be famous to be a hero.

I want to share one last song that popped into my head this morning. I know that there is always hope. Every person has hope because of our Savior, Jesus Christ. He is the ultimate hero. He endured all things. He will never abandon us. He was our hero and He can help us become heroes to others. And the best way to be a hero to someone else is to point them to the Hero.

Hope in Front of Me - Danny Gokey
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5GFiDdGGGM

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